


Panic and Relief

by Soft_Toast



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Bokuto Koutarou & Kuroo Tetsurou are Bros, M/M, Multi, Mutual Pining, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Protective Kuroo Tetsurou
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-17
Updated: 2020-06-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:02:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24779584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Soft_Toast/pseuds/Soft_Toast
Summary: Kenma has a hard week, it all started with a party he didn't really want to be at.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Kudos: 23





	Panic and Relief

**Author's Note:**

> Hi~ 
> 
> This is my first story here. I use to write fanfics a lot but for some reason, I stopped. I'm now picking it back up because I love it so much. this is just a short story I wrote while at work and here and there I hope you like it! 
> 
> Quick shout out to my friend Jay for being the beta reader for this story! thank you so much.

Kenma has always hated physical contact and would panic in large groups, he preferred to stay home and play games while Kuroo sat at the foot of his bed reading his most recent book. So, when Kuroo, the boy who’d rather play volleyball or read in the smaller boy’s room, asked Kenma to accompany him in going to a party that Yamamoto was hosting. The younger boy was a little shocked, to say the least, but he didn’t think twice about it since he knows Kuroo loves hanging out with his volleyball teammates just as much as reading. 

That’s how Kenma found himself sitting in the quietest corner of the Taketora household. Granted still pretty loud for the numerous people and music thumping against the walls. He took a deep breath trying to center his thinking and bring his heartbeat back down to a normal rate. Standing up to shaking legs he headed to the upstairs bathroom, he knew that bathroom was the furthest from the main room hosting the loudspeakers so hopefully, the distance will quiet the noise buzzing in his head, maybe just a little bit. 

He just had to pass Kuroo who was sitting on the couch, talking to a few older girls the team has invited to “make the party livelier.” To Kenma it was just more people he didn’t care about and thus to many people to keep tabs on. The girl’s long hair was draped around their shoulders Kuroo admiring the length of the blonde’s hair. With a frustrated sigh he continues past the older man, completely unaware his best friend caught his sigh. 

Stepping up the stairs he felts his vision waver and blackness creep into his peripheral vision, he didn’t even feel that he knocked into a few party-goers who were making out on the stairs. Then he was at the top of the stairs, everything went black and he felt a repulsive pain in his head- 

_____________

-When he woke, there were many people around him a few faces he recognized, those being Kuroo, Yaku, Yamamoto, and Lev. He placed his arm over his head, the light hurting his eyes and the number of people making his breathing heavy and unstable. 

“Ok everyone he’s fine please continue on with what you were doing.” Kenma knew it was the smooth voice of his best friend talking, but the panic attack creeping onto Kenma kept his breathing hitched. 

“Kenma, can you hear me?” Kuroo always knew how to handle his panic attacks. Knowing his hearing fades in and out, that his breathing becomes unstable, and when it gets really bad how Kenma digs his blunt nails into the palms of his hands in a desperate motion to bring him back to earth. 

Kenma nodded his head, a motion that otherwise would be missed if you weren’t paying close attention to the blond. Kuroo of course caught the movement. 

“Can you walk? I want to go home.” They have been friends for years now, so Kenma knew when something like this happened and Kuroo said “he” wanted to do something it really meant that Kenma needed to leave.  
“I think so.” Kenma sat up, eyes closed. Kuroo took this as a sign to grab the younger’s hand. Leading them out of the house. Their neighborhood not being a far walk away, Kuroo led them to the familiar houses. 

“Why were you trying to go upstairs while having a panic attack?” the tone of Kuroo’s voice was soft but the words stung. 

“The bathroom upstairs is…” Kenma’s free palm was starting to sting. 

“Kitten.” Kuroo sighed, running a hand through his messy hair. “You know there are bathrooms downstairs that were closer.” Kuroo knew the real reason his friend was going upstairs. Kenma has been out of it since they arrived at the house. He should have known to turn around right then and there. He should have known not to get dragged away by the team’s Ace. He should have stayed beside the smaller boy. He should have gotten up when he heard Kenma’s sigh before walking up the stairs. 

“I know that but the noise and there were too many people.” Kuroo’s eye drifted to the free palm of the blond. His heart wrenched seeing the physical pain his best friend was causing himself. He did nothing knowing that Kenma would freak if he held both of his hands in public. People’s eyes would linger a second longer. 

Kenma was great at noticing small things within people. Trying to figure out what will happen next. The clockwork in his brain analyzing every situation. Maybe this was the reason Kenma has panic attacks, there was just too much to analyze. Maybe it was the fact that Kenma didn’t like standing out, maybe it was the years of bullying he experienced. But there were too many factors to take into account and thus thinking about it, Kenma had driven himself into a panic attack. 

“Why didn’t you ask me to go with you?” Kuroo’s voice broke the silence that grew between them. They didn’t even realize they made it back to Kuroo’s house. 

“You were busy, and I didn’t want to bother you.” Kuroo caught the slight wince Kenma made when the nail of his middle finger broke the skin. 

“With what? What was more important than you?” Kuroo spun Kenma around once the door closed behind them grabbing ahold on his other hand lacing the fingers together. The words just slid out, Kuroo was always to blunt guy. 

Kenma’s ears were slightly pink, though because of it being night and them not turning on any lights yet, Kenma didn’t think Kuroo would see his tinted ears. He did though, which made his own cheeks meet the same hue. 

“You were talking to those girls.” Kenma turned his face to the side, not wanting to stare at Kuroo face on. He didn’t want to see his best friend’s face when he brought up the blondes who were all over him.

“Those girls were nothing but troublesome. Yea they had some nice hair, but they were too full of themselves and kept leaning on me.” Kuroo rolled his eyes, eyes rolling back around to look at the blond in front of him, a slight smirk on him. The same smirk that brings the pink color back to Kenma’s ears. He liked knowing he could do that. 

“Besides, they aren’t my type. Don’t you know my type by now?” Kuroo let go of Kenma’s hands filling as if the panic attack has passed since he was making good conversation. He started to take off his shoes, Kenma followed. 

“I don’t pay attention to the people you date Kuroo.” Kenma glaring up at the taller man while taking off his last shoe. 

“That’s a lie, you are the only person I know who pays as much attention to people as you do. Besides I’ve seen your glare when those girls came up to me.” Kuroo laughed when Kenma told him to ‘shut up’. 

“Besides it doesn’t matter who’s in my life, you will always be the most important person to me.” Kuroo left Kenma standing in the doorway.

This. This is why Kenma’s heart stops and his stomach feels light. Because Kuroo does this, he jokes with him but is dead serious with him. Because Kuroo has one particular laugh reserved just for Kenma. Because of the light squeezes of his hand to reassure him. Because of that damn smile. 

“You fell down the stairs. I was so worried when you wouldn’t respond to me.” Kuroo’s voice was more serious than the last sentence. 

“I’m sorry.” 

There were no more words exchanged between the two while they got settled into the older one’s house. By now the Kuroo house was like a second home to Kenma. Kenma noticed how Kuroo went straight to his room, Kenma followed. When he reached the doorway that led into Kuroo’s room to notice the bag on the bag that was halfway fill already. I guess at some point Kuroo decided they were spending the night at the Kosume’s house. 

The silence between them while Kuroo grabbed some clothes and other necessities for the night, and even the walk to Kenma’s house was comfortable. They realized early on in the friendship that they don’t have to be talking all the time. They just enjoyed the presence of each other. 

They walked into the house, kicking off their shoes. Kuroo noticed how quiet the house was. Normally it was quite but Kenma’s mother normally greets them when they walk in. 

“Where’s Auntie?” Kuroo grabbed his shoes to neatly move them out of the walking way. 

“My parents are out of town for the week, they told you and your parents at breakfast on Sunday.” Kuroo watched as Kenma did his normal ‘I’m home’ routine. 

“You have been by yourself since Sunday?” Kuroo asked, they have been spending more time at his house this past week so he should have known something was up. 

“Monday technically, but yes” Kenma took out a few packets of instant ramen from the cabinet

“Why didn’t you ask to spend the night at my house?” Kuroo was worried, Kenma tends to space himself from people right before he falls into himself hard. On these days Kuroo can barely get the blond out of his bed. The younger boy jumping when Kuroo touches him. These days the tears seem to never stop. When he would get him out his movements were slower than normal, more hesitation. Eyes glazed over, not mentally present but in his head, overthinking. 

“I’m fine, I didn’t want to bother you all for an entire week.” Kenma was boiling the water for the second dinner of the night. To be fair Kenma didn’t eat much the first time. Hopefully, he’ll eat more this time. 

“You’re never a bother Kitten.” Kuroo fluffed Kenma’s hair earing him a gruff from the shorter boy. 

Kenma’s face turned into something that has only been seen a few times and they were only recently. 

“What’s with that face?” Kuroo asked, turning around to the refrigerator to grab some eggs. 

“What face?” Kenma’s voice rarely shifts enough to actually hear the differences in the tones but to Kuroo’s well-trained ears, he knows by that tone Kenma genuinely didn’t know. 

“Never mind.” Kuroo let out a small laugh while adding the eggs to some boiling water. Kuroo smiled to himself, he found another thing about Kenma that only he will see. The thought brought his heart rate up and his stomach to do flips. 

“I’m sorry” Kenma's voice was too small that it even shocked Kuroo. 

“Don’t worry about anything. I’m happy to be here than some lame party getting hit on by some slutty girls.” Kuroo said while Kenma ladled the noodles and broth into two bowls. 

“Didn’t you like them?” Kenma asked the taller boy while he added the soft-boiled eggs into the bowls Kenma was holding. 

“Like I said, I have a type. They weren’t my cup of tea.” Kuroo took one of the bowls out of the smaller’s hands. 

“So, then what’s your type?” Kenma met Kuroo’s eyes, standing in the middle of the kitchen holding their bowls of ramen, completely unaware they just made food without the other having to give directions, ask questions, or anything. It was completely second nature to them to move around each other, completing the other. 

Kuroo wasn’t ready for the response Kenma gave him. He was expecting a noise of acknowledgment or something like that. 

“Short blonds.” Quick, and without thought responded. 

He got a noise of acknowledgment he wanted previously. Was it too obvious? He was scared that his friend would catch on. Kuroo didn’t remember when he started to have a crush on his childhood friend. It seems like it had been forever now. 

Kenma moved to the couch, crossing his legs and taking a mouth full of ramen. Kuroo stood still in the kitchen watching Kenma. He found how he crossed his legs to be the cutest thing, causing his heart to melt a little more for him. 

After the food, they moved to Kenma’s room. On their respective phones, just enjoying the presence and warmth they brought to the room. 

Kenma’s phone dropped out of his hand and landed onto the floor beside Kuroo. The older boy looked up at his best friend who's fast asleep on his bed. Smiling he grabs his fallen phone and plugs it in, then he pulled a blanket over him. The sound of Kenma’s phone beeping signalizing he has gotten a text message cut through the otherwise silent room. Tapping on the screen to see if it was Kenma’s mom, knowing she would be worried if he didn’t reply back, but it wasn’t Kenma’s mother. 

From; Shoyo  
“so, then when are you going to tell him then?” 

‘Him?” Kuroo thought, there are only a few people Kenma regularly talks to. Could it be Yaku? Another ding and Kuroo almost drops the phone.

From; Shoyo  
“Kuroo won’t hate you for telling him. I know you're scared about it but trust me.”

They were talking about him. Instantly feeling the regret for invading Kenma’s privacy, he fought the urge to click on the notification to bring up the rest of the conversation. 

Four the first time, Kuroo has the panic attack….

**Author's Note:**

> I will be trying to update as much as possible but I'm a working college student, but with quarantine, I feel like I have a lot of down time to kill. 
> 
> side note I'm not really good with naming things, so for now this story is called 'Panic and relief' but I would love to change it. if you have suggestions fill free to let me know!


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